Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Just Saying

Just Saying is a guest post by Graham Kent. Visit this hilarious bastard over at Speaking Of Segues.

Dr. Phil is on in the background because of the few channels I get, it's one that comes in the clearest and isn't a non-stop infomercial selling vacuums. It's just white noise while I work. Here's the story today.

A 17-year old girl is on the show. She got pregnant when she was 15, but didn't want a baby. Oops, she's not 16 and can't have an abortion, so she started smoking to try and have a miscarriage. Didn't work. She was going to have a kid. Birthed it herself, but it was a stillbirth. Took the dead child out to a tree on their property, dug a big hole, and buried the baby in a box.

Thing is, she also took a picture on her cell phone of the dead baby's hand in her own hand. The girl's mother, being the mother of a teenage girl, snooped through her phone and found the picture. Recognized the tree. Went out to the tree and dug. Found the skeletal remains.

Girl was originally charged with first degree murder, but when they acknowledged it was a stillbirth they changed it to desecration of human remains. She's on the show today because she's tired of people calling her a baby killer and wants to set the record straight.


Because being called a baby killer is terrible.

But not wearing a condom, not having an abortion, not telling anybody, smoking in order to try and induce a miscarriage, birthing the child in secret, and burying the dead body in the woods is much better.

To add insult to injury, she buried a poem with her baby. Something to the effect of;

"As I write this, I bury you
And on this day my life is through
You never got to enjoy life
But mine is filled with troubled strife..."

How absolutely shitty teen-angsty is that? It's not bad enough that she did everything she did, but she also had to throw the worst piece of shit poem in there? Even the baby is probably like, "Wow, mom, after all this, that's the best you can do for me? Save that shit for your livejournal."

Anyway, just saying.


  1. Why do I feel like I'm going to suddenly get a bunch of hate-mail and seem even less attractive to women?

    We'll see how long before I ask you to take this down haha.

  2. hahahahahahahaha