Dear Guy: An Open Letter To A Dick

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The Gas Pump: A Caution Notice Critique

This notice is posted on gas pumps everywhere so, if you’ve ever pumped gas, you’ve probably ignored it several times.

Inferring From Horoscopes

The Metro Editor Can Be Fired Any Day Now

 

You've got to be kidding me. The fact that this got to print is ridiculous, unacceptable, and ridiculously unacceptable. Who edits this shit? Were they on vacation? Or did they have more pressing issues than doing their job - spell-checking the newspaper - like determining the consistency of their lunch meat condiments? I'm thisclose to reading the Toronto Sun. Do you hear me? The fucking Sun.

Extreme Brand Loyalty

There’s no shortage of companies offering discounts or cash for their customers’ undying loyalty and Ecko has just joined the game. Are you still wearing Ecko? Are you still paying full price for it? If you answered yes to those questions, you’re an idiot and, being an idiot, you obviously haven’t heard of Ecko’s Branded For Life campaign.

8 Crappy Gmail Labs

Gmail Labs is a testing ground for experimental features that aren't quite ready for primetime. They may change, break or disappear at any time.

I hope these ones change, break or disappear soon because I hate them.

Eff The Snapshot Discount

I just saw a commercial for Progressive Auto Insurance and they were hawking this product called Snapshot Discount.

What the hell is Snapshot Discount? Glad you asked.

Just Saying

3 Recent Grievances

Entitled To Damages: VOL 2

Why is it that, in this day and age, anytime you have a problem with someone or something, you can just sue the shit out of them?

Have you ever inadvertently walked into a mall fountain? You just may be Entitled To Damages.